Posted in Friendship, Human Tendency, Life, Love, Personality, Relationship

A friend in need is a friend indeed, really?

In this blog, I have tried to touch upon two very serious issues i.e. trusting strangers blindly and judging friends instantly. Oh come on, don’t give me that hatred looks. My intention is not to scare you on the Friendship Day. I just aim to warn you against the possible threats that may arise on account of the human behaviour. I hope this blog turns out to be of some help to you and henceforth, you don’t get trapped in a vicious circle of getting manipulated by all those who project themselves to be your true friend but in reality, have some hidden intentions to take advantage of you. At the same time, you don’t lose your genuine friends, who for varied reasons might not be physically present in your tough times, but their wishes are always there with you. This friendship day, let us try seeing friendship from a different perspective.

“A friend in need is a friend indeed” – Almost everyone must have heard this proverb a lot many times in their respective lives. This proverb literally means that “Someone who is there at our times of need is a friend, while those, who could not be a helping hand, at the time we needed them the most, are not our friends”. Knowingly or unknowingly, over the time, this proverb has become a “parameter” to evaluate friendship. I am sure most of us have used it to judge our friends and strangers, some time or the other. However, did you ever give it a thought that is this parameter in itself correct or not?

Every time I came across this proverb, I was compelled to ask myself a simple question – Is friendship only dependent on our needs? This simple question, in turn, gave birth to a series of questions. Is it right on our part to think that all those whom we consider as our friend, but who could not be of any help in our desperate times, actually betrayed us? Couldn’t they have their own valid reasons for not being able to help us, at that time? Conversely, can we blindly rely on and trust all those who helped us in our adversity and consider them to be our true friend with genuine intentions? Couldn’t they have some hidden agenda behind helping us?

When I tried to dig more upon these issues, I came up to the conclusion that it is merely selfish on our part to evaluate a beautiful relation like friendship solely based on the availability of a person in our needs. When we try to judge people based on our need then we actually behave in a selfish manner because at all such times we place our needs on top of everything else. What we care about is just our needs and nothing else. We don’t even consider someone’s genuine problem, before holding them responsible for not helping us in our times of need. Do note that by doing so, there is always a high probability of us losing a genuine friend or we might end up befriending with some stranger having wrong intentions.

Hence, it’s an earnest request to each one of you that never ever blindly trust anyone who lends their shoulder to you in your tough times. Give it some time before you place faith on anyone, especially in such situations. Under no circumstances, consider anyone as your genuine friend just because s/he helped you to overcome in your adverse time. You might feel indebted to them for helping you when you needed it the most, but this doesn’t mean that you give them free hand to use you, as per their will. Do remember that “Friendship does not originate out of obligation”.

Similarly, my humble request to you is that before you opt out of friendships do give your friend enough opportunity to justify their stand. Don’t try to judge your friends just because they were not able to help you in your tough times. Everyone has their priority and limitations. It’s impossible for anyone to be always present when we need them but this does not mean that they don’t intend to help us. Do remember that “Friendship doesn’t survive on expectations”.

I would further like to take this opportunity to make an appeal to everyone. I might sound harsh, but my personal view is that be extra cautious with someone who lends you their shoulder when you are low because that is the time when you are the weakest and anyone can take advantage of you and your condition just by sounding sweet and genuine. It might happen that their real identity is never unveiled in front of you until they eventually stab you. So it is advisable to be cautious in choosing your friends and welcoming strangers in your life. Do remember that “Precaution is better than cure”.

I request you to accept my warm wishes on the occasion of friendship day. Enjoy your life in the company of good-hearted people, make genuine friends and keep smiling always. I wish that the Almighty give good sense to each one of us.

Happy Friendship Day!

Stay in touch. God bless you all.

Peyush Jain