Posted in Hope, New Year

New Year – An arrival of New Hopes

This blog is an attempt to jot down the qualities that I wish we all imbibe in our personality in this New Year. All these qualities will surely make our life beautiful, as well as, the world a wonderful place to live in, with utmost peace and happiness. Let us all strive to attain the qualities that should be a part of the real human being and let the flame of hope always lightened up in our hearts. “Being in love and loving the beings is the driving force of this universe”. Let us all be the soldiers of humanity and ensure that the flag of ‘Humanity’ is always flying high, with utmost pride, up in the sky.

It’s the time to celebrate. It’s the time to enjoy. It’s the time to make a lot of resolutions. It’s the time to let go the sorrows and let in the happiness. It’s the time to embrace a new beginning with lots of positivity. It’s the time to witness the rise of a new dawn of hopes. It’s the time to welcome the arrival of a New Year.

Let us all start this New Year with positive vibes, overflowing from all the directions. Let us ensure that there is no place for negativity in the atmosphere. Let us all pledge that we will make this world a peaceful and happy place to live in. Let us all unite together with the ideology of ‘Humanism’.  Let us throw away all kinds of discriminations that originate from gender, caste, creed, colour etcetera. Let us sow the seeds of a new world wherein love will prevail over everything.

Hope for a new beginning. Hope for opportunities. Hope for a better future. Hope for a divine world. Hope for a united world. Hope for peace. Hope for love. Hope for happiness. Hope for prosperity. Hope for food and shelter for every soul. Hope for good health. Hope for equality. Hope for respect. Hope for kindness. Hope for care. Hope for the well-being of every soul. Hope for a society that breeds good human beings.

Strive to excel. Strive to gain knowledge. Strive to work hard. Strive to achieve the goals. Strive to be aware of the reason of our birth. Strive to prove our worth. Strive to smile in the tough times. Strive to survive the adversities. Strive to make a society that advocates the ideology of equality. Strive to help the needy. Strive to be a good human being. Strive to attain peace of mind. Strive to be contented. Strive to attain Nirvana.

Be creative. Be thoughtful. Be courageous. Be logical. Be excited. Be productive. Be charming. Be humorous. Be sarcastic. Be a kid at heart. Be positive. Be friendly. Be respectful. Be modest. Be polite. Be grounded. Be faithful. Be trustful. Be honest. Be dedicated. Be committed. Be good at heart. Be a reason for a smile in someone’s life.

Love for everyone and everything. Love towards living and non-living beings. Love towards every soul. Love towards the elders. Love towards the animals. Love towards hatred. Love towards the enemies. Love towards the sorrows. Love towards the adversities. Love towards the work.

Now, the clocks tick tock rhyme in our ears is an indication that it’s the time for the arrival of a new phase in our life. So let’s start the countdown – 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1….Happy New Year!

Once again I would like to wish you all a very happy and a prosperous new year.

God Bless you all!

Peyush Jain

Posted in Happiness, Meditation, New Year, Past, Peace, Yoga

Is it worth to analyze our past?

First of all, let me wish you all a very Happy and a Prosperous New Year. It’s a yearly custom that we welcome the New Year and leaves past the old year, in our memories to be remembered, “at our ease”. Well, everything that goes away leaves behind memories to remember and cherish. I deliberately choose to mention ‘cherish’ because we don’t gain anything by sobbing over things that had already faded up. Ek he zindai hai, usey hans ke guzar lo, agar rona he hai, toh khushi ke ansun baha lo” (“There is only one life, live it happily my boy; if at all you need to cry, then let those tears be the tears of joy”).

I want to take this opportunity to pierce one of my thoughts in your pre-occupied mind, so kindly let me penetrate inside the web of your intelligent thoughts. I hope this write-up will benefit you, in some way or the other. So be ready to experience a voyage of enlightenment. There is absolutely nothing to lose, so no harm in travelling and gaining the experience of this ‘free’ tour. Make sure that before starting the trip, you leave aside all the preconceived notions and just let yourself flow with the wind.

Every year, at this time, we all think that how fast the last year had passed away (Jaisey kal he baat thi). But, tell me seriously how many of us, sit peacefully and analyze how our last year departed? What are the takeaway and things to learn from our past? How can we get better in our future? Very few of us do that analysis, right? Why can’t we be one of those few, who dig their past for a better future and thereby contribute towards a better world altogether? Although, it is said that “Leave the past and live in present” but “Being Human” we got to learn from our past. Don’t you agree with me?

So, if you agree and are ready for the expedition, then you got to turn the pages of your autobiography and look around what impacted you during the past 365/366 days. You got to analyze each and every little incidence that left an indelible mark in your life or maybe because of you in someone else’s life too. This sounds good, isn’t it? However, the questions that pop up in our mind are whether this is at all feasible? If yes, then by what means we can travel into our past?

The answer to these questions is quite simple. Till the time, anyone invents the ‘Time Machine’ our ‘Mind’ is the only machine which can possibly take us anywhere. Hence, we got to utilize this ‘free of charge’ machine to travel distances, time, places etc. The only prerequisite to using this machine is ‘Peace’. A peaceful mind is the greatest weapon that anyone can possess. We can reach miles with a peaceful mind. So, we know the mechanism to start our remarkable journey from present to the past. Now, the fuel for this journey is the thought that “We are on this trip only to analyze our life”. We got to fill the machine with this fuel and start the engine. This thought will remind us, time and again, the reason for our trip and will stop us from getting distracted by the bad or sad things, which we will surely come across when we travel the length and breadth of our past life.

Hence, here we are with a peaceful mind, travelling into the world which we had already passed, way back. We got to concentrate now (keeping the above thought in our mind) and start identifying the incidences, one by one. The incidences may vary from having a bed tea on a lazy Sunday morning, our country winning a sport competition, an interesting date with an interesting person, the achievement/failures in our endeavor, a fight with a loved one, a loss of someone special in our life; it could also be any recent controversy in the political/social front or even the thought that which blog of mine was better etcetera. Now, from all these incidences we got to select those which impacted our life in a real sense.

Once we have identified the incidences which impacted us the most, we reach the final stage of our trip. In this stage, we got to analyze the incidences, with the objective to find out the root cause and the solutions thereof. This exercise will not only open up our perspective to deal with adverse situations but also help us in tackling with such incidences if we once again encounter them in the future. Once we are done with analyzing our entire past year (or the time we set for introspection), we can end our journey and jot down the summary of our experience, as well as, take away from this journey.

After this fruitful exercise, I am sure you will be more relaxed and in more peace. I hope you will enjoy the path, as well as, the destination. This is worth trying, indeed a lifetime experience. Well those of you who still think that I have gone mad, I accept that compliment with a smile.

Let us all embrace the prosperous and warm dawn of a New Year with a big smile. The life is beautiful so enjoy it to the fullest, “Kya pata kal ho na ho”. I wish that this New Year brings with it the utmost happiness, peace, and prosperity in everyone’s life.

God Bless! Be in touch.

Peyush Jain

Posted in Banks, End Use of Funds, Financial Institutions, Financial Risk, RBI, Slogging

Monitoring the “End Use of Funds” by the Financial Institutions – Is it done in the right spirit?

Reserve Bank of India (RBI) on dated January 14, 2011, issued a notification, RBI/2010-11/368 DBS.CO.PPD.BC.NO. 5/11.01.005/2010-11. As per the said notification, RBI advised the banks that the efficacy of the existing machinery in the banks for post-sanction and follow-up of advances may be evaluated and made robust, wherever considered necessary. The need for this notification arises because, as an outcome, from the RBI assessment of the practices at certain banks for ensuring the end use of funds, it was revealed that the expected level of due diligence had not been exercised in some cases facilitating “diversion of funds by the borrowers”. (Courtesy: http://www.rbi.org.in).

This blog will try to throw some light on the issue that how far the said notification is being able to impact the “post-sanction monitoring of funds” by the financial sector in India. It is almost 4 years since this notification was issued by the RBI i.e. the Central Bank that regulates the financial institutions in India. So, let me try and comprehend from a layman’s point of view the monitoring of the end use of funds by the financial institutions. Note: I have deliberately used the word ‘Financial Institutions’ in the blog instead of restricting it only to ‘Banks’ because my personal view is that monitoring of end-use of funds is not only the duty but also in the interest of every financial institution/person that grants loan, irrespective of whether it is a bank or not.

First of all, let us understand what does monitoring of “End Use of Funds” by the financial institution’s means. In this context, it means that the financial institutions need to monitor the utilization of funds, in order to ensure that the borrower had actually deployed the borrowed funds, only for the purpose for which it was sanctioned by the respective financial institution. Thus, it is one of the due diligence checks implemented by the financial institutions to ensure that there is no diversion of funds by the borrower.

Many measures have been recognized for monitoring the end use of funds like periodic scrutiny of progress reports/financial statements/books of accounts, regular visits to the units, inspections and audits of securities/stocks, obtaining of declaration/certificates from the borrowers that the funds have been utilized for the purpose it was approved for, etcetera. However, the question that arises is whether in reality, the financial institutions ensures to monitor the end use of funds, with utmost due diligence or not?

Although, the notification strikes a very important issue to curb the misuse of borrowed funds, but in reality, the same has not been taken up in the right spirit by most of the financial institutions. As far as, loans that are granted for the purchase of any fixed assets are concerned, usually the payment is made by the financial institutions in the name of the Owner/Seller/Builder etcetera. So, by and large, monitoring of end-use of funds is not a difficult task in all such cases if due diligence has been taken care of, at the time of sanction of loans. However, monitoring of end-use of funds in all the other loans i.e. personal, renovation/repair of fixed assets, etcetera is extremely important because in all such loans there is a high probability of diversion and misuse of funds by the borrower.

Anyone who closely analyse the ground realities could easily vouch for the fact that especially in personal loans and loans for renovation/repair of fixed assets, there is no monitoring of end-use of funds by most of the financial institutions. Although, the loans for renovation/repair of fixed assets is disbursed based on the completion certificates issued by the internal staff/consultants, but still the hard core reality is that the end use of funds in such cases is also prone to be misused. In personal loans and loans for renovation/repair of fixed assets, at the most, a Declaration/Certificate is obtained from the borrowers mentioning that they have utilized the funds for the purpose it has been approved for and in case of any incorrect declaration/certification, prompt action as may be warranted, shall be initiated against the borrower. Needless to mention here that the borrowers blindly ‘autograph’ this declaration along with the “set of papers” they are ‘directed’ to sign by the representative of the respective financial institutions.

But this practise somehow raises a lot of questions and doubts in the mind. Does merely by obtaining a Declaration/Certificate the very purpose of the said notification will get served or not? Whether signing of the declaration by the borrower could be taken as a confirmation that the end use of funds is appropriately done? What if the intention of the borrower is to make an illegitimate use of the borrowed funds? Taking of declaration by the borrower and solely relying on the same could no way serve the purpose and in reality, it fails to address the core issue for which this notification was being issued by the RBI. However, as a practice, “in order to comply with the RBI guidelines”, a Declaration/Certificate is obtained from the borrowers with regard to “End Use of Funds”.

We should understand the importance of monitoring the end use of funds and the implications thereof, in case we fail to monitor the same properly. The task of monitoring the end use of funds by the financial institutions is extremely essential for the soundness of any finance sector. It not only plays a major role in reducing the risk involved in the illegitimate use of funds by way of diversion of funds. But at the same time, it also confirms that the funds are being deployed for the very purpose they were meant to, and in that way safeguards the funds from getting Non-recoverable, Non-Performing Assets (NPAs) in future.

Having said that we need to come up with a practical solution for ensuring that the borrowed funds are applied for the purpose it is meant to. Well, as per my suggestion all the financial institutions should have a dedicated panel of internal staff/consultants who will “solely certify the end use of funds by the borrower i.e. End User”. This certification will be based on their inspection, rather than the current practice of merely satisfying as a ‘formality’, by obtaining a declaration from the respective borrowers.

Until the time, this activity is taken up seriously by the financial institutions, the end use of borrowed funds could not be certified with surety and it will be a loophole open for the malicious borrowers to take advantage, at their will. All the financial institutions, as well as, The Reserve Bank of India should look into this matter with utmost seriousness, which will go in the long run for the financial soundness of the financial sector, as well as, our economy, as a whole.

 

Peyush Jain

Posted in Crime, Democracy, Injustice, Judicial System, Justice, Juvenile, Rape, Slogging, Victim, Woman

Juvenile Justice (Care and Protection of Children) Bill, 2014 – Did we succeed in sending the right message to the criminals?

Juvenile Justice (Care and Protection of Children) Bill, 2014, which was passed by Lok Sabha on dated 07th May 2015, got the assent of the Rajya Sabha on dated 22nd December 2015. Now it will be sent for the approval of the Honourable President of India. Once the bill gets the consent of the President of India, it will replace the present Juvenile Justice (Care and Protection of Children)
Act, 2000 and will come into existence as a Law, from the date notified in the official gazette.

What was the need to bring about a change in the present Act? – The brutal gang rape with ‘Nirbhaya’ on 16th December 2012, which shook up the entire nation and the social outburst, as well as, the media coverage after that incidence was actually the trigger point that led to the amendment in the present Act.

What was the demand of the society? – The foremost demand of the common people was that the juvenile who are involved in heinous offences should be treated and tried at par, with the adult offenders, and the law should ensure that there is a provision of severe punishment for the convicts “irrespective of age”, in all such cases.

The two major changes incorporated in the Juvenile Justice Bill, 2014 – The two major changes brought about in the bill are that Firstly, the age of the juvenile involved in heinous offences is reduced from 18 years to 16 years and Secondly, the tenure of imprisonment in heinous offences is increased from maximum term of 3 years to maximum term of 7 years -10 years.

The questions that strike in the mind of the common men – Are those changes enough to curb the involvement of juveniles in heinous offences? Are the provisions inserted in the said bill fair enough to bring down the occurrence of brutal cases? What if any juvenile, who is below the age of 16 years, is found convicted of any heinous offence? Did we succeed in sending the right message to the criminals? Was it a real tribute to ‘Nirbhaya’, in the sense, that we did our level best to ensure that no such incidence will happen in future? Can we look into the eyes of the woman and say that we did something that will ensure that the new dawn will be much safer for them? Are we even aware of what we are seeding for the generations to come?

Well, as a common man what I feel is that, we once again failed to send a strong message to the criminals who are involved in all such inhuman acts, we once again failed to introduce a strong law against the criminals involved in heinous offences, we once again failed to save humanity from getting shattered. I may sound illogical to the lawmakers but my eyes can foresee that nothing is going to change with the recent amendments. ‘Nirbhaya’ (Fearless) is going to be blown out, every now and then, by the cyclones of criminals and the sufferers will always be the woman and their families. The reality is that we are not serious about the safety of women. Although, in our country, we worship woman as a Goddesses, but in our deeds, we don’t care about anything that is concerned with them. We failed to show that we have a zero tolerance against any heinous offence. Laws should be made to protect the innocent, to have a fear among the hearts of the criminals, but not to give the offenders an opportunity to escape.

Herewith, I would like to quote the following paragraph extracted from my other Blog “16th December 2012 – The Night that never saw the Dawn”. “Today on 20th December 2015, one of the culprits is set free on the ground that he was a juvenile at the time when he raped that innocent girl. Can a person, who was involved in a brutal gang rape, wherein the inhuman males went to the extent of inserting a rusted iron rod in the genital organs of a girl and assaulting her so bad that even her intestine is reported to have come out of the body, set free merely because he was a juvenile? What kind of a society we are breeding by such laws? Aren’t we conveying the message that the juvenile has all the freedom to do, as they wish because the maximum imprisonment is of 3 years? It’s a humble request that please stop discriminating the culprit with age, gender, caste, creed, colour etcetera. They are ‘Inhuman’…Period.

Now, it is for each one of us to introspect that are we taking the desired lessons from our past, to act soundly in our present, for a better future or not? I wish that the almighty give us the good sense to think for the sake of humanity, as a whole.

Peyush Jain

Posted in Crime, Democracy, Injustice, Judicial System, Justice, Rape, Slogging, Victim, Woman

16th December 2012 – The Night that never saw the Dawn

The cold night of 16thDecember 2012, witnessed a brutal gang rape of a brave human being named ‘Nirbhaya’, by six coward inhuman beings. The dreams of a young innocent girl of just 23 years of age were shattered in that single night. She was like any other girl, the pride of her family, a trustable shoulder for her friends and above all a normal human being. She wanted to live, she wanted to pursue her dreams and she wanted to witness that dawn when the culprits will get punished for their act. But all her wishes came to an end. Alas, that was the Night that never saw the Dawn.

Maybe, the almighty did not want her to suffer for more in this cruel world, as such took her away from us, within a few days of that brutal incidence. On 29th December 2012, even before the dawn could break, ‘Nirbhaya’ took her last breath, after bravely fighting for her life during all those painful days.

What was her fault? Why was she made to suffer to that extent? What was the mistake of her family? Was being a girl her fault? Was it a mistake of her family that they gave birth to a female child in this cruel world? ‘Nirbhaya’ has gone far away from us but she left behind a lot of questions to be answered by us. Her family is left broken and from that day onwards their only aim of life is to get justice in this case. Even after 3 long years, the wet tired eyes of her family members are still waiting for that very moment when the cruel killers of ‘Nirbhaya’ will get the punishment they deserve. What a shame, that after three long years of that incident her mother has to say that “Crime has won and I have lost”.

It is rightly said that “Justice delayed, is justice denied”. In all such cases, not only the victim suffers but their family is destined to die every moment waiting for justice. While the culprit laughs at the system which gives them the freedom to commit such inhuman act and still get away from any kind of severe punishment. It’s shameful on our part that we couldn’t bring a new law into existence even in a long duration of three years from that incidence. Are we even concerned about woman’s safety? Yet, we want the common man to have faith in our judicial system.

Today on 20th December 2015, one of the culprits is set free on the ground that he was a juvenile at the time when he raped that innocent girl. Can a person, who was involved in a brutal gang rape, wherein the inhuman males went to the extent of inserting a rusted iron rod in the genital organs of a girl and assaulting her so bad that even her intestine is reported to have come out of the body, set free merely because he was a juvenile? What kind of a society we are breeding by such laws? Aren’t we conveying the message that the juvenile has all the freedom to do, as they wish because the maximum imprisonment is of 3 years? It’s a humble request that please stop discriminating the culprit with age, gender, caste, creed, colour etcetera. They are ‘Inhuman’…Period.

Herewith, I would like to quote the following paragraph extracted from my other Blog “India – My Country, My Dream”, under the sub-heading Crime free India – “The growth in the number of rape cases is too scaring. What a shameful and alarming situation for any country to get 4-5 rapes cases registered every hour. We can just imagine what will be the figure like when the number of cases that do not get registered or the cases of Domestic Violence etcetera comes on record. Aren’t we taking such cases too casually? Can we put our hand on our heart and claim that we have a zero tolerance policy in all such cases? Just name one ‘successful’ measure that our society, our government has taken to bring down such cases. It’s a humble request of this common man that irrespective of all the other measures to stop such cases, “It’s a high time we male take a pledge, that let the female be our mother, sister, friend, colleague, wife or in any other relation to name with, but never ever be our victim”.”

16th December 2012, was a day of shame, a day of sorrow, a day of emotional outburst, and a day of introspection for every human soul. It is not about a city, not about a country, not about modernization, not about culture but it is about humanity. Humanity is at stake. Joseph Conrad (a polish author) once said that “Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men”. Today, if we look around we will agree to what he said. But is it only about agreeing with what he said or do we want to change the views? Yes, we can change it by giving the much deserved “respect & love to every single woman”. I am sure our respect & love towards the woman will indeed enable us one day, to quote that “Being a woman is the most wonderful task since it consists principally in dealing with men”. That day humanity will feel proud on Humans.

Whenever we hear about such cruel incident, the heart cries out and prays that such incidences should not happen with any woman. However, nothing changes in reality. We get back to our routine life and forget everything as if nothing actually happened and simply wait for another brutal incident to take place after which we can mourn a bit. Hope, we realize that it’s a high time that we save humanity from getting shattered, every now and then. I would like to request every female that please be safe and please be extra cautious.

Nirbhaya’ (means Fearless), the flame of your personality will always ignite our memories and you will indeed live forever in our heart!!!

My prayers for the family of ‘Nirbhaya’ and wish that the almighty keeps ‘Nirbhaya’ happy wherever she is.

God bless!

Peyush Jain

Posted in Feminist, Fun, Human Tendency, Humanist, Humour, Men, Sarcasm, Sarcastic, Slogging

Men will be Men

Statutory Warning: I am a real man and extremely proud to be one. I am a ‘humanist’ and I believe in equal rights for everyone, irrespective of the gender, caste, creed, colour etcetera. However, compliments like a pervert, male chauvinist or likewise are most welcome, “if anyone gets the urge to do so”, especially after reading this blog. I assure you that all such compliments will be highly appreciated and shall be accepted with a bow (without an arrow).


“Men will be Men” when people say this phrase, what exactly do they mean? Do they want every man to turn up into a pretty woman, one fine day? I mean are men supposed to check their gender every single morning in anticipation to be amazed one fortunate day, when they get transformed into a woman, in place of the ‘stupid’ man lying on the bed last night and the very reason of their birth will eventually get accomplished that day?

This blog will try to flush away all such confusions from the mind of every soul. It is dedicated to all the real man out there. This is an attempt to enlighten the world that “Man is an emotional HUMAN being”.

Let me take this opportunity to highlight some of the basic attributes that are an integral part of a ‘Real Man’ anatomy, with the appropriate reasons thereof. Don’t raise your eyebrows; just let your preconceived notions rest for some time, while you dive in depth of this blog.

Master in optimum utilization of resources – Man is always ‘complimented’ to have two heads. Why are you laughing? That’s a compliment, right? Isn’t it always good to have two heads, rather than owning merely one head? Well, if the claim of having two heads is true then that obviously gives us an extra edge. That in itself proves that we are born smart.

Men are also charged with the allegation that they always think from only one head. Now, what’s wrong in that? When one head is working perfectly fine, then why to give pain to the other one? Isn’t that sheer waste of resources to use both the heads simultaneously? Aren’t we taught that when we have extra resources then it’s our duty to use them prudently and don’t waste them? As such, we simply follow the motto that use one head and let the other head rest for the time being. See, now that is called as optimum utilization of resources and we are a master in that.

On the contrary, those who compliment us for having two heads, as well as, allege us that we think only with one head should actually get there facts right and make a note of the ‘hardcore’ reality, that the extra head can’t work in isolation if the other head is not working properly.

Consistent Soul – Consistency is our birth trait. We are so consistent in our conduct that nothing can distract our actions. Let me explain this with an example. We never get tired following up a woman, even if the woman says loud and clear “on our face” that she is not interested, we still keep on trying and trying. See, how consistent we poor man are. Okay stop giving me those frown looks, I agree we keep on trying until and unless we get another woman to try our luck. Nevertheless, the money, energy and the time we devote in following the females is just commendable. We don’t lose any opportunity to get a glimpse of the girl and gain her attention, by hook or by crook. Doesn’t this prove that men are the most consistent living being present in the universe?

Now, the fact is that man keeps following the woman even after she shows her disinterest, with the only motive to ensure that she is happy and not missing him in his absence. Awe aren’t we a darling to think like that? See how caring and consistent we man are.

Sex Obsessed – Men are accused of thinking about sex 24X7. First of all, I am eager to meet that person who researched a man’s mind and came up with this conclusion. I would like to understand in depth the methodology adopted in their research and will get into every minute detail pertaining to the subject. After all, this is the favourite subject of all men.

I mean really you believe that men only think about sex all the time? Come on, with my experience I can very well say that at least 4 times a day we do think about food too. That’s so unfair if you accuse us of thinking about sex all the time. We are not robots, so please have some mercy and make it 20X7. Now, that sounds much closer to the reality. All man out there you deserve to thank me for bringing that figure 4 hours down with my logic. Although, I know that we won’t miss any chance in those precious 4 hours too.

However, the truth is that we are born with a ‘Sex Pressure’; it’s something like ‘Blood Pressure’. As the blood pressure gets high and low, similarly our sex pressure gets high and low too. So we should rather get a pat on the back, to handle one more pressure in addition to all those pressures that a human being has to go through. As and when, the pressure descends we are so cute, lovable and most importantly ‘productive’. Didn’t you ever notice that?

Uncomplicated Being – I am sure everyone undoubtedly agrees on this point. But still, I will explain this in detail because I have a lot of material on this topic. Yes, men are so simple and uncomplicated. Let me prove this by an example, the uncomplicated man knows only one word i.e. ‘shaving’, as far as, hair removal is concerned. Be it the removal of a beard, moustache, as well as, when anyone gets the entire hair on their head removed we address it as “They shaved their head”. Isn’t life so simple when seen from a man’s eyes? Hair removal = Shave, that’s it, no more complications.

However, as far as, women are concerned there are a couple of terms like Threading, Waxing, Upper lip blah blah blah, and surprisingly all stands for Hair removal. Gosh, that’s sooooooooo complicated. I, sometimes wonder how girls remember all these complicated words. At times, I get so depressed with my memorising power. But, on the second thought, I think that will it suit the girls to say something like “I got my eyebrows shaved”? Oh, my God, that sounds yuck. Now, I can say that some things only suit a man.

In reality, men love to live a simple life and don’t want to give extra pain to their little brain. That’s the very reason that we follow the policy of “less is more”. (Threading, Waxing, Upper lip…Oh God I already feel exhausted)

Sharp Memory – Every man is accused of forgetting things and that to forgetting the important dates. I agree that this is a crime all men are unarguably guilty of. How can we forget dates pertaining to birthday, anniversary, date when we first interacted, date when we first ask her out, date when she finally said yes on being continually begged by us for coming out, date of our first official date, date of this, date of that and the list is never ever forever not ending.

I wonder how can woman “with only one head” remember all those complicated terms (Gosh, I guess I am stuck to Threading, Waxing, Upper lip) when their single head is already working overtime to memorise dates of every single important/not so important activity that happens in their life. On the memory part, you girls undoubtedly score full marks and no man can compete, as far as, remembering dates are concerned.

However, the fact is that we don’t trouble our brain much and, as such, we simply forget to remember that “we need to remember” the important dates. Nevertheless, we do remember the dates to pay the taxes, bills, all street addresses without GPRS facility etcetera. Oops forgot to mention the two important things in our memory list i.e. the names of all of your friends (only girls) and the birthday of your cute friend. Now, don’t you think that all this is a lot of stuff to occupy our small brain? So the next times, whenever you want us to remember anything, then first take the trouble to delete the already existing crap in our mind. Then there is a little chance that we may remember some of the ‘important’ dates as ‘required’ by you.

Cost Conscious – Men are extremely cost conscious. I am sure that’s a known fact, isn’t it? We don’t believe in wasting money on gifts, flowers, chocolate etcetera. No expenditure on makeup kits, body lotions, beauty creams etcetera. At the most, we will apply some lotion on the body parts that are visible (uncovered), like the face and palms. God forbid if any surprise physical check is done on our body and clothes, I am confident and scared that not only the hidden skin will surface up as something that is desperately craving for body lotion but, at the same time, our inner clothes will turn out to be airy too. That’s the proof that to what extreme we can go, as far as, cost saving is concerned. If you don’t believe me then sponsor one such camp of a physical check and let the scary truth be revealed right in front of you.

However, you will be surprised to know the hidden truth behind our indulgence in all those cost saving measures. You know we save because we want the saving to be spent on, for and with you girls. We are so caring, isn’t it? What now? You want to hug me on that revelation? No please, I am hug allergic.

Adjusting Nature – Although, I mentioned in the above point on Cost Conscious that we don’t believe in wasting money on gifts, flowers, chocolates etcetera. But still we are so adjusting that we do spend a lot on that stuff to make the world around us, “a happy place to live in”. However, it will be right to say that during the entire meeting wherein we have gifted something, our mind is too engrossed in calculating the expenditure we made on all those unnecessary things. Okay now take a deep breath and don’t worry I won’t ask you to return all those things that I ever gifted to you (although I wish I could). Wait a minute, I just realised that I never gifted anything to anyone. Wow, I feel so relieved and proud. However, what matters is the fact that we are so adjusting, that against our wish also we do a lot of things.

That was merely one example to convey that we are so adjusting. There are a lot many things that we adjust. Like we adjust our hearing capacity based on the quantum of talks girls do, we adjust our vision based on the girls in our vicinity, we adjust our nostrils and breathing, as and when we find a girl nearby to us etcetera. Oh, men, we are so accommodating and adjusting (Actually, I won’t hide the fact that, I also realised this just now that we adjust so many things).

Innocent – We man by default are innocent. Yes, we are so innocent that most of the time we get used by others for their personal benefits and ‘knowingly’ we ignore it. However, there are people who won’t believe this rather they think that we actually enjoy getting used, especially when the one who is using us is of opposite gender. Okay, to be frank, we do enjoy that but Shhhhh doesn’t share this secret with anyone.

On a serious note, it’s our way of conveying the females that we are always available, irrespective of the reason for which our presence matters in their life. Isn’t that an innocent gesture?

Men are Dogs – Wow that’s a compliment to grab. The most loyal, obedient, unconditional lover and a human-friendly creature is a dog. So if we are compared to dogs then that’s the biggest praise for the entire male community. Yes, we are dogs and that’s a matter of pride for us. There is nothing to argue on that front. I am a dog and I am extremely happy being addressed as a dog.

Just now, I got a thought whether all those who call men as dogs are aware that if all men are dogs then all women will be?

Well, the list of basic attributes seems to be never ending and I can keep going on and on. However, I know that this much is more than enough, as of now, to grab all those ‘compliments’ as mentioned at the start.

What an irony, the same people who talk about the equal rights of gender specific, adjudge all man to be same. I mean, how can anyone say that “All men are alike”? Doesn’t that tantamount to discrimination, in itself? Well, still we the ‘innocent’ men never complaint on the discriminatory treatment that we experience, at every phase of our life.

The entire male fraternity is on the radar of almost everyone, especially when something wrong happens with another ‘human being’, which is of opposite gender. We have all the respect for women, our heart cries out if anything wrong happens with any living being. We are standing side by side, in their good and testing times. We all are human and there are a lot of flaws in each and every one of us. So let’s stop any kind of discrimination and let us all live with utmost love and affection. Be a ‘Humanist’. It’s a humble request to all of you that please stop discriminating the culprit with gender, caste, creed, colour etcetera. They are ‘Inhuman’…Period.

Now, I would like to end this blog with the thought that maybe sometime in future, I may come up with a sequence of this blog to bug you more. So until next time “Men will be Men”, you got to bear with it.

Do take care and keep smiling! God Bless.

Peyush Jain

Posted in Depression, Human Tendency, Life

Depression – A Clash of Actual vs. Expectation

Depression is defined as “A mental state characterized by a pessimistic sense of inadequacy and a despondent lack of activity”. (Courtesy: Word Web Dictionary). At the start of this blog, I would like to inform that I am not a doctor, researcher, or the subject matter expert. However, I have my eyes and ears open and could sense a lot of depressed soul in this world. So this blog is an attempt to share the thoughts about depression from a layman’s point of view. Hope my effort could instil life in the depressed souls.


As per my view, depression is the end result of “negative” thoughts that overpowers our mind. If we conduct a root cause analysis of depression, then we will reach on to the conclusion that there is only one factor that leads to the state of depression i.e. “Our inability to accept the actual result, as against our expectation”. Let us understand this by picking up some simple incidences from our routine life. Say for example, when we don’t score good grades in the exams, when we are not able to get something that we desire, like a good job, someone whom we love, etcetera then eventually we get depressed because the results were not as “expected” by us.

If we closely examine all the above-mentioned situations then we will realize that there is a clash of Actual vs. Expectation in our mind. Now, it will be prudent to mention here that all those who can accept the actual result, as it is, and take learning’s from the same, would never get trapped into the vicious circle of depression. However, those who can’t get over with their expectations and keep sticking to the negative thoughts that strike their mind will eventually sink into the mire of depression.

At times, we compare ourselves, our life, our achievement, all in all, each and everything with someone else. But at the same time, we forget to take into consideration all the pains/struggle with which the other person has gone through. We try to see only one side of the life of the person with whom we compare ourselves. What is the sheer point in comparing ourselves with someone else, when no one in the world is alike? By comparing ourselves with others we disgrace no one else but our own self.

We should keep in mind that to get depressed is a normal state of mind, so there is nothing unusual in that. Every living being gets depressed on non-fulfilment of their desires, on non-achievement of the results etcetera. However, what leads to the state of chronic depression “as a disease”, is when we can’t get over with that state of mind. Getting depressed should be a momentary state and one should know how to “divert” their mind and come out of that situation, as soon as possible. If we are able to get our mind and heart diverted then we can win over all the negative thoughts, at any point of time in our life.

When we are in a stable set of mind, it will be beneficial for us to introspect that are we ready to accept the results that come our way or not. If not, then it’s a high time we train our mind to be contented with what we achieve in this journey of life. Once a person gets into the state of depression it is very difficult to think about their inner self. The medicines become a part and parcel of the routine life and a depressed soul loose trust on almost everyone. So it’s better to test ourselves before it’s too late.

Just remember that no one in this world is happy. People who “stay” happy are the one who is contented with what they have. “Being contented is the art of accepting the results, against the expectations”. One who is contented will never get into the state of depression in life. However, being contented does not mean that one stops striving for excellence. Accepting the present, contenting with what one achieves and moving on for a better result in the future should be the motto of our life.

So guys win over the negative thoughts and live a peaceful, contented and happy life.

God Bless every soul!

Peyush Jain